The Westminster Alice

MP3 Audio CD. The Westminster Alice

ALICE IN DOWNING STREET


“Have you ever seen an Ineptitude?” asked the Cheshire Cat suddenly; the
Cat was nothing if not abrupt.

“Not in real life,” said Alice. “Have you any about here?”

“A few,” answered the Cat comprehensively. “Over there, for instance,”
it added, contracting its pupils to the requisite focus, “is the most
perfect specimen we have.”

Alice followed the direction of its glance and noticed for the first
time a figure sitting in a very uncomfortable attitude on nothing in
particular. Alice had no time to wonder how it managed to do it, she was
busy taking in the appearance of the creature, which was something like
a badly-written note of interrogation and something like a guillemot,
and seemed to have been trying to preen its rather untidy plumage with
whitewash. “What a dreadful mess it’s in!” she remarked, after gazing at
it for a few moments in silence. “What is it, and why is it here?”

“It hasn’t any meaning,” said the Cat, “it simply is.”

“Can it talk?” asked Alice eagerly.

“It has never done anything else,” chuckled the Cat.

“Can you tell me what you are doing here?” Alice inquired politely. The
Ineptitude shook its head with a deprecatory motion and commenced to
drawl, “I haven’t an idea.”